Tribute....

Grandma with Baby Owen

During my hiatus from blogging...my dear sweet Grandma Goff passed away.

My Grandma Goff has always been a very big part of my life...we lived only miles away from them. They supported us in all that we did from the time we were little to now when we have little ones....

....dance performances...sporting events...missions...graduations...marriages...babies...blessings and baptisms...

Every year for our birthdays they would make a special date and take their grandchildren out to dinner...I always chose Pancho Villas...it was such a special treat to be with them, to have them all to yourself!!! And such a treat for me, back then...we didn't go out to eat much...so it was very fun to do that.

My grandparents were always around...we visited them every Sunday evening. I realize now how lucky I was to have them be such a big part of my life.

My Grandma will always hold a special place in my Tate's heart...they shared a Birthday...July 14th...and every year my Grandma would tell Tate that he could have all the rest of the Birthdays...but what a special thing to share...she loved Tate and they shared a special little bond. Tate was able to be a honorary pallbearer at her funeral...an honor that he holds close to his heart. I am so grateful that my boys had the opportunity to know her, to love her and to be loved by her.

Last May my Grandma moved into to my mom and dad's, I am so grateful that we had the opportunity to be so close to her for the last year of her life. I am so grateful that my boys had the opportunity to be around her so much. Back in October my dad and his siblings moved her into an assisited living place...as she was becoming too hard to care for...she was so mad at them at first, but for a few months I think she really enjoyed the friendship of those elderly people that lived there. At Christmas she was doing great. At our family Christmas Party she really seemed to enjoy herself being with all of us...laughing and enjoying the kids and sharing in our spirit. In late January I think she decided for herself that she was done and just wanted to die...she gradually stopped eating and drinking and really detiriated by February she was falling all the time and really making her life miserable. A few days before she passed my mom told us the Dr. didn't think she would make it too much longer.

Saturday morning, March 27th my mom called me and told me that the Hospice nurse thought that she probably had a week...she had an infection and could not swallow anything. During that night she was calling out to Grandpa...calling him by name. After I got off the phone with my mom I had the distinct impression that I needed to get there THAT day to see my Grandma...I had a feeling that she would not make it past that day...I put off the promptings...it was a Saturday...lots of things to do...I would get there...but I didn't...I didn't make it...and I will never know what I had to learn by being there with her that day. I will never ignore those promptings again, because you may never get the chance to get it back.

The week of the funeral was a blur...we had plans to go camping for Easter in Zions which I was trying to get ready for...and we had our family in town from Seattle for the funeral.

I was handling everything really well...I was there after my Grandma passed...I could feel her sweet spirit and I could feel her happiness that she was back with Grandpa...that is all she has wanted since he passed...was to be with him, and she had her wish...what a reunion that must have been. So I felt good about letting her go. But the day of the funeral I was caught off guard with my feelings. I was extremely emotional. As we sad our final goodbyes...it was difficult...it is extremely difficult to watch your children trying to comprehend death and saying goodbye. My little tender-hearted Tate struggled and even Davis was upset by all that was taking place. And it hit me...what a large part this wonderful woman had been in my life. Her death also marks the last of my living grandparents...and that means that I might have to actually accept the fact I am a grown-up...

We buried Grandma on April 1st, a beautiful, spring...SNOWY day...craziest spring day I have ever seen....

My grandparents have a large posterity...they have taught us so much about how to be a family and to love. They have given me a father that respects and honors his priesthood and takes care of his family. I am grateful for their influence in our lives and I am so grateful for their influence on my boys lives. I am so grateful that we believe in eternal families and that I will see them both again some day...God be with you till we meet again...I love you Grandma...